Fostering Growth When Living With A Negativistic Personality, Feelings, Or Behaviors

Some people may seem to struggle with acquiring new skills, accepting feedback from others, or engaging in personal growth. These people might be living with a negativistic personality, formerly referred to as passive-aggressive personality disorder (PAPD). Although PAPD is not listed in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition (DSM-5), the symptoms are real and can have significant impacts on one’s life. Below, you can explore the symptoms of a negativistic personality and find ways to increase your openness if you believe you might be living with this challenge. 

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What is a negativistic personality? Understanding passive-aggressive personality disorder  

A negativistic personality refers to behavioral patterns that involve defensiveness in response to demands for performance in relationships, at work, or in other aspects of daily life. People with this type of personality might procrastinate, intentionally work slowly, or forget tasks to avoid having to complete them. They may avoid having a conversation with a loved one about topics that make them uncomfortable, putting it off and making excuses to avoid having to take responsibility. 

Is negativistic personality disorder real? Understanding passive-aggressive personality disorder (PAPD) 

Passive-aggressive personality disorder (PAPD) was first added to the DSM in the first edition, with three subtypes: helpless, indecisive, and clingy. In the DSM-5, this condition was renamed to dependent personality disorder. 

In interim, in the DSM-4, the term negativistic personality disorder (NEGPD) was used to describe the following symptoms, though it was later amended as described above:

• Passive-aggressive behavior
• Resistance to tasks
• Complaints of being misunderstood 
• Argumentativeness 
• Criticism 
• Defensiveness 
• Scorn of authority 
• Envy and resentment 
• Exaggerations of misfortune 
• Hostility 
• Acting in a forgetful or indolent manner when confronted 
• A pervasive pattern of a lack of personality functioning 

This condition was not carried over into the DSM-5 because the American Psychiatric Association did not fully accept it, and passive-aggressive behavior was deemed too situational to warrant a diagnosis. In addition, many of these symptoms overlapped with other personality disorders, such as dependent personality disorder and avoidant personality disorder. So as of today, neither NEGPD nor PAPD are considered diagnosable disorders. Instead, a clinician might slot symptoms into the category of another condition or view them as nonclinical tendencies that can be addressed.

What causes a negativistic personality and feelings of helplessness?

A negativistic personality type or a related personality disorder can have several possible causes. The following are some potential contributing factors. 

Traumatic past experiences

Trauma can cause symptoms that are similar to those that were listed in the early versions of the DSM for negativistic personality disorder. Consider that the following are also symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and some if not most personality disorders caused by trauma: 

• Hostile and negative responses to others 
• Anger and aggression
• Hypervigilance 
• Sullen and irritable moods 
• Contrary and irksome behaviors 
• A seeming inability to control a negative attitude 
• Distrust of others 
• Withdrawal from social situations
• A tendency to view the world negatively 
• Self-loathing and difficulty finding positive traits in oneself 
• Intense conflict with others 
• Active or passive resistance to change 

If you think you might be living with signs of PTSD or other effects of trauma, it’s generally recommended that you reach out to a mental health professional. They can help you understand the origins of your symptoms, such as the specific genetic and environmental factors that may have an influence. 

Defense and protection mechanisms

In childhood, many people develop defense mechanisms to protect themselves from hurt, whether from their family, strangers, or their environment. Some people may react by withdrawing, becoming pessimistic, and avoiding making an effort to change. Others may react by facing the situation head-on, making multiple changes and attempts to communicate. 

Defense mechanisms are often associated with one’s attachment style, which can be avoidant, anxious, or disorganized. People with a negativistic personality type might be more likely to have an avoidant or disorganized attachment style. 

Other mental health conditions 

Certain mental health conditions can also have similar symptoms to those laid out in early versions of the DSM for passive-aggressive personality disorder. For example, major depressive episodes frequently cause social withdrawal, a lack of motivation, and difficulty making changes. These symptoms can look like a lack of initiative when they are actually caused by a diagnosable condition. For this reason, talking to a therapist or another mental health professional can be important for getting the proper support. 

The connection between a negativistic personality and pathological demand avoidance behaviors  

Avoidance of change and positive behavior can be a sign of pathological demand avoidance in some people. A person who frequently scorns authority, expresses envy, and rejects help when offered might be rejecting the pressure of someone else’s demands. 

This symptom is most common in those with neurodevelopmental conditions like autism spectrum disorder (ASD) and attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). If you frequently become angry, defensive, and bothered when others try to tell you what to do, you might be experiencing this symptom. 

Is autism or ADHD causing these behaviors and feelings?  

Autism and ADHD are separate conditions, and both require a diagnosis from a licensed mental health professional. Below are some of the symptoms people with both conditions might experience: 

• Social challenges and deficits 
• Repetitive, obsessive behavior patterns 
• Stimming (self-stimulation, such as hand-flapping or rocking back and forth) 
• Hyperactivity 
• Difficulty focusing (except for on one’s intense interests) 
• Difficulty sitting still or waiting 
• Difficulty with communication 

Around 50% to 70% of Autistic adults also have ADHD, so these conditions often co-exist, though this is not the case for everyone. Both conditions must start in childhood in order to be diagnosed in early adulthood or later. Talk to a mental health professional if you think you might be living with one of these conditions. 

Increasing your openness and positive behavior 

Part of the negativistic personality type is resistance to openness and new situations. Increasing openness as a personality trait usually starts with small steps to try new things, make better choices, and go out of your comfort zone. You might expose yourself to your fears in small ways, open your mind to other perspectives, and work on calming your anger in new situations where you want to hide, act out, or become aggressive. Working with a therapist throughout this process can be helpful.

Addressing learned helplessness and avoidant behavior 

If you learned to act helpless from a young age to cope with trauma or difficult relationships, you might continue these patterns and specific pathological personality traits in adulthood. Learned helplessness refers to the mindset that you cannot make a change and are stuck in your circumstances, even if these aren’t true. This mindset can make it difficult to get a job, leave unhealthy relationships, live independently, and trust your own judgment. Below are a few ways to start addressing this mindset: 

• Remind yourself that your beliefs about yourself and the world don’t necessarily reflect reality 
• Remind yourself that thoughts are different from behaviors and personality (in other words, you are not your thoughts) 
• Go out of your comfort zone at least once a week by trying something new 
• Talk to people with vastly different opinions from you and try to find something in common with them 
• Journal about why you’re struggling to make changes
• Outline your goals and find one small step you can take per week or month that can help you start moving toward them 
• When you become frustrated with others pressuring you to change, ask yourself why it bothers you, and consider journaling or making art about it 

Fostering emotional intelligence 

Emotional intelligence is another skill that may help you manage a tendency to use unhealthy coping and defensive maneuvers. You may be able to grow emotionally by learning about your defense mechanisms, personality type, attachment style, and emotional needs. You might also start labeling your emotions to better understand what you are feeling at any given moment. Knowing what you’re feeling is often the first step to getting through it. 

Many people think emotional intelligence means ignoring, pushing away, or rejecting your emotions to remain “logical.” However, emotional intelligence actually involves feeling your emotions openly, processing them when they occur, and allowing yourself to move on. Emotions serve the purpose of giving you information about a situation. For example, anger might tell you that you have been wronged, whereas sadness might tell you that taking time to grieve would help you. 

Open up and grow in therapy

Talk to a compassionate therapist

Mental health support options

If you believe you may have a negativistic personality, you’re not alone. Finding support from a mental health professional can help you pinpoint the cause of this personality trait and learn to manage its effects. 

If you’re not comfortable attending therapy in person, you might start by talking to a therapist online. Online therapy platforms like BetterHelp allow you to meet with a provider from home via phone, video, or live chat. In addition, you can use tools like journaling prompts, worksheets, goal-tracking, and support groups to help you meet your treatment goals. 

Studies suggest that online therapy can often be effective for addressing many types of mental health challenges—including PTSD, a common cause of learned helplessness and other symptoms associated with a negativistic personality. With an online platform, you can work through traumas from a safe environment, like your home, and find others who connect with your experiences through weekly (optional) support groups.